Creating a right-paced business

Adele Barlow on simple business

The Third Door is a weekly newsletter about sustainable business strategy for solopreneurs and creative souls who want more out of life than the status quo, hosted by business coach and strategist Jenni Gritters. If you’ve been reading this newsletter for a while (formerly called Mindset Mastery) and you receive value from it, I’d encourage you to sign up for a paid subscription.

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When I first met Adele Barlow, I was floored by her calm energy and incredible creativity and intelligence. Then I started recruiting guests to be interviewed about their third doors for this newsletter and she immediately came to mind. So today, I’d like to introduce you to Adele.

Adele is the founder of Copy & Co, a boutique content studio serving challenger brands in London, New York and beyond. She is also an author, and her writing has appeared in the Huffington Post and Soho House magazine. Her upcoming Amazon series, Authentic Ambition, helps millennial women carve out their own unique definitions of success. 

Adele, how would you describe your work right now?

I’m a writer! There have been some seasons where I’ve focused on writing for companies and others where I’ve focused on my own. Right now, I’m working on my non-fiction series, ‘Authentic Ambition’, about how millennial women are redefining success instead of trying to “have it all.” More women are speaking out about this, which is great! The whole ‘Superwoman’ concept is such a tired cultural hangover from the 90s. These days, many women are forging new, unique career paths, which I wanted to explore.

I’ve been in marketing for over 17 years and run a boutique content studio, Copy & Co, which does content strategy and production for challenger brands. These are the types of brands (startups, scale-ups) where I’ve spent most of my career. I’ve become more interested in AI lately, so I’m researching that. I’m trying to see what all the fuss is about and whether we human content writers are on the professional equivalent of the Titanic, etc.

What does embracing a "third way" look like in your life?

I grew up globally as a Third Culture Kid (TCK). Embracing a “third way” in life has been similar to being a TCK, in that you’re never fully in one world but instead are moving between different ones. Right now, I feel like I’m moving between the marketing and tech worlds and the writing and publishing worlds. 

I’ve always been ambitious but more drawn to building a portfolio career than climbing the corporate ladder. I recently read ‘The Pathless Path’ and thought it beautifully summed up the pull towards this direction that many of us feel. The older I get, the more I crave work that fits around my life instead of vice versa. It’s not always possible, and living in an expensive city like London means compromises sometimes have to be made – but my dream has always been to be globally mobile and creative.

And I do feel like I’m getting closer to that with Copy & Co and my books, although it’s painfully true that the “third way” to success feels much more squiggly than a simple straight line. Some weeks, I get zero book writing done, but then I’ll have a random day where I get 5,000 words out because of an idea that came to me in the shower. 

What does embracing a "third way" look like in your businesses and work?

Setting up Copy & Co in 2021 was about pushing myself professionally but in a way where my values came first. The previous year, I’d hit a point where the next step was to go for a Head of Marketing role or go out on my own. I was 34 and wanted to stay flexible as I knew having kids was on the horizon. 

I remember walking around the park in 2020 and having the “Into the Unknown” Frozen song in my head on a loop. I took it as a sign that it was time to go into the unknown myself and step back into a founder role. Since college, I’ve been involved in startups; sometimes, I’ve been in the founder's seat, and other times, I’ve been working on someone else’s startup.

The first thing I did was to reach out to people who might need marketing help. I knew some startup folks and marketers who might need a hand but not a full-time hire, and it was those conversations that led to Copy & Co making six figures in the first 18 months. I only say that to show no matter how fancy the tech gets, business opportunities have always been and will always be about relationships! And people trusting you to do good work, and to help them get to where they want to go.

Tell us about your unique approach to building a right-paced business, and why it's worked for you.

The line between self-employed and unemployed is sometimes wafer-thin, and when I have a lighter client load, I’m like: WTF am I actually doing here? But then again, if you’re constantly in delivery, delivery, delivery mode for clients, you’re not really giving yourself a chance to be strategic or dream up new products or let your creativity flow, which is the key reason a lot of people choose this path in the first place. 

That’s why quarterly check-ins are crucial. I used to do them with my business buddy Mallory who lives in Seattle, and whenever we were both in the same city, we’d do a long meeting where we got clear on our goals. I’ve also done check-ins with business coaches, and that recent session I had with you, Jenni, was really uplifting. I also bounce ideas off my husband. Having someone you respect zoom out with you on the bigger picture can help you set meaningful, realistic goals that give momentum. Otherwise, it can feel like you’re floating aimlessly in a very self-contained ecosystem. 

What I love about building a right-paced business is I get to set the pace. This past year, going through IVF treatment has been my top priority, and I’ve taken on client work that fits the stability I’ve been after and said no to work I haven’t had the capacity for. Whereas in the first year of Copy & Co, I said yes to EVERYTHING! That pace wouldn’t be feasible right now. The seasons of life are going to change, and it’s impossible to predict. 

What do you believe about the "rules" people teach us, related to running a business and living a life? What good has come from you choosing another path?

It’s easy to overcomplicate it, but the main “rule” when running a business is that you’re bringing in more money than you’re spending. It’s different in the startup world, as a startup is an organization in search of its business model, but generally, keeping a small business afloat hangs by that one fundamental truth. And you don’t need to have gone to a fancy school or have studied a particular discipline to know how to run a small business. In fact, too much theory can sometimes get in the way of actually taking action, from what I’ve seen. 

When it comes to life generally, having grown up on different continents, I’ve seen friends and peers take so many different paths, and I genuinely don’t believe there’s one “right” way to live. We’re all wired differently and only we know what’s best for us. I love that Hindu proverb: “There are hundreds of paths up the mountain, all leading to the same place, so it doesn’t matter which path you take. The only person wasting time is the one who runs around the mountain, telling everyone that his or her path is wrong.”

Choosing another path has meant learning to think for myself. My path is so different from the ones my parents took; it’s not one that was advertised to me at any career fair. And there has been friction at times, but friction can eventually lead to a sense of being antifragile or super-resilient, which is helpful because you need a thick skin to keep going.

There can be major heartbreak in business: people betraying you, dreams not working out, and the rejection that comes with the creative industries. Then there can be people who might be triggered when they see you doing your own thing, as it raises questions about their own life. It’s taken me years to build a little fortress around my mind and to let the right people in while accepting that any judgments others have of me are none of my business. 

What does growth look like for you in the next season of your life, as your businesses (and desires) continue to adapt?

I’m excited about the non-fiction series I’m working on and the AI research. I’m also looking forward to adapting to the seasons as they arrive instead of trying to project years into the future as I have done in the past. As for survival strategies, I reach out for help as much as I need, whether that’s working with an accountant, going to therapy, or turning to books like The Book of Boundaries by Melissa Urban. I loved that book! What I took from it is that those who get upset about boundaries are the very people for whom boundaries were designed.

Overall, I’m more conscious now about the pressure I put on myself. I noticed how much pressure some friends put on themselves, and I don’t know if it’s a habit we absorb from society or something we use as a coping mechanism. But a major spiritual assignment for high-achieving women is learning we were never meant to figure out ALL the answers ALL on our own. So many women are at a crossroads and seem kind of mad at themselves for not only not having what they want – but not knowing what they want. But as Abraham Maslow said: “It isn't normal to know what we want. It is a rare and difficult psychological achievement.” Beating ourselves up rarely gets us anywhere worth going. 

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Curious about my background? I’m a writer and business coach living in Central Oregon. My goal is to teach everyone who will listen that it’s possible to build a simple, stable, successful business that support your human needs first. Join my group coaching program, SUSTAIN, for more conversations like this (and a community of people who are all about the path less taken), and follow me on Twitter & Instagram.